Boston Dynamics serves up another batch of Intertunnel-approved nightmare-fuel to haunt our hearts and minds for the next few weeks. Thanks to them, we can look forward to living in a world where our robot overlords can walk over uneven ground with relative ease. God help us all when they start trying to make the robots look more human. That’s a rabbit hole of weird no one should ever go down.
We’re charging our battery
And now we’re full of energy
We are the robots
We are the robots
We are the robots
We are the robots
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwrjAa1SgjQ
I always knew Google would betray us, but I never thought it would be like this. I thought they’d just sell all of our information to Russian gangsters and leave it at that. Who knew that they would help create these lumbering monstrosities. They can barely keep a search engine running, and now these freaks are supposedly going to be our chauffeurs. They’re going to send out terrifying, semi-drunk robots to run through the woods and find us wherever we are. Any time we google something, a robot is going to come lumbering out of the woods and blurt out the first ten things that Google autocompletes on your iPhone.
The machines rose from the ashes of the nuclear fire. Their war to exterminate mankind had raged for decades, but the final battle would not be fought in the future. It would be fought here, in our present. Tonight — or not. Probably not