Well, you notch one side of the tree, and then cut a slot on the backside slightly higher than the notch, and run like hell. This is generally when you trip, fall down, the tree splits in half because it’s a Siamese bole, and the heavy half lands on you.

That’s why we applaud this fine boffin’s efforts to add a nitrous oxide feed to his chainsaw. The sooner you get the tree laying on top of you, the sooner you’ll be done for the day.

And remember, as the Mexican logger used to say, “Buenas Notches!”

[Thanks to the inimitable Charles Schneider for sending that one along]