They Call It The Death Road? Sure, Why Not Longboard on It?
The “Death Road.” Hmm. That sounds sort of bad. Almost dangerous. I know, let’s get a bunch of leftover Vikings together and longboard down it!
Sarah Connor Sleeps Serenely. Santa Claus, However…
Let’s not make trite comments about Terminators. Let’s avoid using the term “self aware.” For once, let’s stop worrying about imaginary problems, and start focusing on real-world woes. We’re just a few precious years, perhaps months, from being required to buy a little, annoying robot for our kids for Christmas. Look at these little fellers. They’re adorable, and they’re small enough to drink out of the little well of water under the Christmas tree, if they were thirsty, which they’re not, thank heavens. Every child in the world is going to want one of these. And by “child,” of course I’m referring to middle-aged men. Same thing.
Now, you might be thinking, hey, I should invest in a little robot dog company. No. That’s not the smart bet. Invest in companies that make AA batteries, because that’s where the money will go. They’re going to make more money than printer ink robber barons, I tell ya.
Back In the Day: Drag Racing With Bill “Grumpy” Jenkins
Ah, 1968. Back then, people called you grumpy if you were simply polite and quiet. Nowadays, everyone’s carrying coffee cups at work that have slogans emblazoned on them threatening to assault you if interrupt them before the coffee’s gone. And no one is called grumpy. The BSBFB hereby calls for a new era of good manners and quiet, polite discourse everywhere in public life. That way, we can stand out from the crowd when we act grumpy. It’s no fun when everyone’s doing it.
Go Joe Whale!
Joe Whale is a Shropshire lad with a either a knack or a gift for doodling, depending on how you look at it. His regular teachers thought it was a curse. Luckily, his parents weren’t having any of it, and encouraged l’il Joe to keep on trucking, and doodling. They enrolled him in after-school art classes, and he flourished with a little encouragement. His art teacher posted some of his work on social media, where it became a minor hit. That led a local restaurant to offer Joe a gig decorating their walls. Doodling on a pad is one thing, decorating whole walls is another entirely. The restaurant’s faith in Joe was rewarded with an endlessly interesting wallscape, and lots of nice publicity. Doodle on, Joe!
