I Seem To Have Located Russia’s Minister Of Total Random Awesomeness

I Seem To Have Located Russia’s Minister Of Total Random Awesomeness


Ah, Russia. I have no idea what the hell’s going on there, or why it is, and I suspect neither do the people that inhabit the place. Everything just happens, and in the wrong alphabet and season, too, and they film it on their stolen dashcams and release it to the entire world, which stretches from YouTube clear to LiveLeak.

No way to tell if Putin gives the Minister Of Random Awesomeness a salary, or he pays Putin for the privilege of smearing himself with last season’s snow and pulling more babes than a Cyrillic Elvis. Either way, it’s a good gig. 

The Isle Of Man Oh Man That’s Fast

The Isle Of Man Oh Man That’s Fast


Let’s face facts. If they didn’t have the coolest motorcycle race in the world, the Intertunnel wouldn’t pay much attention to the Isle of Man.

But we’re the Borderline Sociopathic Blog for Boys, so we’re duty-bound to pay attention to someplace called “The Isle of Man”, aren’t we? It’s like a law or a rule or good manners or something. During race time, The Isle of Man is an isle of real men, holding on with all their might to a rocket with two wheels. The rest of the year is just the home of Manx housecats, I’m pretty sure.

It’s the most exhilarating race of any kind in the world.  And since the world is a wonderful place with cameras everywhere, we get to go along for the ride.

In Bizarro World, It’s Still WWII And The Swiss Air Force Is Strafing Mount Fuji

In Bizarro World, It’s Still WWII And The Swiss Air Force Is Strafing Mount Fuji


I never believed that “neutrality” stuff about the Swiss. There’s nothing neutral about them. They’re like a housecat. They may be neutered, but they ain’t neutral. They only pretend not to pay attention to you, but if you fall asleep on the couch, they start wacking on your nose. This is just like that, except it’s a Swiss dude with a jet pack instead of a cat, and he’ s flying past Mount Fuji instead of shredding all the toilet paper in the bathroom. Other than that, it’s identical.

Let’s Go Surfin’ Now, Everybody’s Learnin’ How, Come On A … Dear Lord, What Was I Thinking?

Let’s Go Surfin’ Now, Everybody’s Learnin’ How, Come On A … Dear Lord, What Was I Thinking?


Well, if you don’t like getting wet, you could always roller skate down the side of a five-storey building, and get a comparable thrill.

Of course, in my day, the king of all surfers would be crowned immediately if he managed to paddle out there in the first place. Now you get towed. What’s next, a chair lift?