Way out East there was this fella — fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Robbie. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. Robbie, he called himself Robbie. Now,Robbie — he didn’t make a whole lot of sense. And a lot about where he lived, likewise.
At least he’s wearing pants. At least he’s not grunting and thrusting at the camera. At least he’s not doing a lot of thing. He seems to be doing a lot of hard work, which we can never approve of. Squatting is also a no-no. If it can’t be done in an afternoon while standing up it’s not worth doing. I know that limits your options, but it’s the only way to go. We’re all very busy people and we simply can’t be bothered with activities that require more than 5 minutes of work and a fifth of cheap scotch.
https://youtu.be/dLWdFeefFIA
We’re the LA Dodgers, and if you study with our eight-week program you will learn a system of being terrible at everything that we developed over two seasons of sleeping on mattresses stuffed with gold bullion and hundred-dollar bills. It’s called Dodger Kwon Do! After one week with us in our eight-week program, you’ll be prepared to run with the strength of an LA Dodger’s fan, the reflexes of a throw rug, and the wisdom of a man.
You see, what we’re talkin’ about here is an organism that imitates other life-forms, and it imitates ’em perfectly. When this thing attacked our dogs it tried to digest them — absorb them, and in the process shape its own cells to imitate them.
Or it could just be winter in Western Maine. I can’t quite tell yet. Every time winter rolls around I feel like I’m staring in a remake of The Thing.