BSBFB

Jones’ Far-Reaching-Ass YouTube Empire

May 20, 2015 aubuchon Comments 0 Comment

He’s back, and he’s better than ever. Serial Blog For Boys post-ee Jones has made a glorious return with his new business venture, Jones’ Good-Ass BBQ and Foot Massage. Two things that I never thought would go together have been fused into one slimy mess, and I love it. He’s turned his big-ass truck rental and storage shop into an international empire. It’s like he’s unleashed Cthulhu onto the business world. Nothing will ever be the same. I expect that he’ll start opening truck stop saunas and Chuck E. Cheese methadone clinics in the near future.

…

Read More Read More

Welcome To The Home Shopping Network Featuring Hannibal Lecter

May 19, 2015 aubuchon Comments 0 Comment

I have no idea what I’m looking at, but I need it to stop. Not only is there nothing on heaven or Earth that could compel me to wear those shoes, I’m never taking this man out to lunch. Even if he offered to pay. Even if he offered to drive and pay and feed me peeled grapes, I would not do it. He licked the bottom of a shoe, that’s all you need to know. I don’t think I need to explain myself further.

…

Read More Read More

Will It Shred?

May 18, 2015 aubuchon Comments 2 comments

Good evening, everyone. On tonight’s episode of Will It Shred, we’ll be shredding the hopes and dreams of every 11-year-old kid in America — or the only transportation that a 40-year-old with 3 DUIs can afford. That’s right, folks: when you’re banned from riding the bus because of your indecent exposure charges, you get a bike. Two wheels semi-inflated wheels, a seat that makes impalement look comfy, and a bell to annoy the neighbors, a bike is man’s best friend if all of your friends are dead or not returning your calls. On tonight’s show we’re throwing some bicycles into our shredder and seeing what happens. And now, a word from our sponsors.

…

Read More Read More

For The Love Of God, Please Try This At Home

May 17, 2015 aubuchon Comments 0 Comment

Fireworks are a man’s best friend. They make dogs look like angry ex girlfriends, except dogs usually don’t burn your clothes after they’re done ripping them up. Fireworks will still burn your clothes, but you can fix that by simply not wearing a shirt. The average BSBFB reader knows enough to start off shirtless, so that problem probably won’t come up.

…

Read More Read More