A large group of Russian soldiers crossing the Finnish border area in 1939 were moving down a road when they heard a voice from behind a small hill:
“One Finnish soldier is better than ten Russian!”
The Russian commander quickly ordered 10 of his best men to go over the hill. A vicious gun-battle broke out and continued for a few minutes, and then there was silence.
Well, apparently someone took me up on my sarcastic suggestion to report the girls from the University of Alabama Sorority video for having fun, or not wearing Birkenstocks and wool socks, or not protesting outside of a Chik-Fil-A, or just generally seeming to have fun, which is verboten nowadays. Their video is yanked from the Intertunnel. This aggression will not stand.
In solidarity with our sisters in the sorority, we’ve decided to bring the heavy artillery to the imagined oppression fight. The heavy cannons. The big guns. The Berthas.
Men, tell your kids to go upstairs and advise your wives to leave the room, because you’re about to witness what’s tantamount to straight-up, hardcore porn. You have to sit through the ludicrous story at the beginning where everyone struts around before getting into the nitty gritty, but oh boy — that nitty is gritty. This is the stuff that blue-blooded, steel-hearted, freedom-loving, commie-stomping American dreams are made of.
Happiness is a warm gun, and all that jazz. I’ve never been a fan of that song. It seemed rather aimless, and like it completely misses the point. While you can say the same about my blog posts, a Beatles song shouldn’t fall victim to aimlessness. I’m much more fond of Rocky Raccoon, anyways.