This very cool marble machine should be rejiggered and reconfigured to play Too Much Time On My Hands by Styx. Because I’m trying to picture how much time it took to make it. Building that thing is a part time full time job and a half. It’s got more man-hours in it than a common streetwalker.
Maybe it’s just me, but auto racing doesn’t seem to have the pizzazz it used to have. Even this Ferrari F 187 is too “new” for my tastes. I much prefer watching the old footage of colorful men driving black and white cars. Now the men are colorless.
That was the most 80s thing I’ve seen all day, and I just finished watching every season of Miami Vice in chronological order while combing my mullet and listening to my favorite Spandau Ballet record on repeat.
Dating is a tricky, dangerous business. Tricky because it’s more sophisticated and difficult that Chinese calculus, and dangerous because women are usually involved. Guys act really weird when trying to attract the attention of the opposite gender. Take this video for example: those guys are trying everything they can think of to look appealing when they’d be much better off sitting completely still for three minutes and staring into the camera. From that footage alone a woman can tell if they want you or not. Trust me, saying anything will significantly reduce your chances of actually finding anyone.
When I go out on a date or I’m trying to flirt with someone, I usually only say about four words: hi, bye, and check, please. If she asks me any questions I either nod or grunt to answer. I’m told that I’m a very good listener. Every once in a while our eyes meet, but even then I don’t say anything, or smile, or give any indication of how I’m feeling. These simple methods have worked supremely well for me — none of my dates have ever called me back for another date.
I think I might have the wrong attitude for dating, but I like eating at restaurants and I don’t like to go alone. Normally, I’d just hire working girls to go out to dinner with me, but there are tons of women who will eat with you for free.