If he just gets one more tom tom he could totally do YYZ — not that anyone would want him to. Besides, he would most likely spontaneously combust from the sheer awesomeness of it, or perish in a bizarre gardening accident.

I can’t feel sorry for him though. He knew the risks going in. Rock and roll is a mercurial multi-headed fire-breathing mistress in a tube top. He should play it smart. He needs to ditch the drums in favor of a nice bassoon. You never hear about bassoon players getting into any trouble or bursting into flames onstage. They never get untoward publicity from trashing a hotel room, because hotel rooms are expensive. Bassoon players stay at the Motel 6, and everything is bolted to the floor, and the walls are made from concrete blocks.