Real Men: The Antipodes

Real Men: The Antipodes

So, yesterday we showed you real men at work. Today, we show you — something else. I’m not sure what to call it, actually. It’s some kind of scrawny bird that’s twitching and trembling from fright. Every sound in the world seems to make it skittish. Someone is trying to take its picture, like it’s the last passenger pigeon in the world or something, but the timid creature won’t stand still.

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Oh, Look. Real Men

Oh, Look. Real Men

http://i.imgur.com/mSypaWl.gifv
They’re hunted to extinction now, but thank God someone got a picture of real men while they were still walking the Earth. I have it on good authority that this is the way real men acted back in the day. They weren’t afraid of a hot rivet, of course, because ten years before this, they’d been shot at by the Wehrmacht and the Imperial Japanese Navy.

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Ladies and Gentlemen, the 2016 Atomic Doorstop and Alimony Parade

Ladies and Gentlemen, the 2016 Atomic Doorstop and Alimony Parade

Those are Lamborghinis.

The ancients believed that individual prosperity was a sign that God approved of you. In the modern world, a Lamborghini is a sign that the Devil thinks you have too much money. He figures you have so much dough that you’ll spend a quarter-mil on a car designed by eight-year-old boys and Italian men, which is pretty much the same thing.

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Who Do You Think You Are? Stirling Moss?

Who Do You Think You Are? Stirling Moss?

Stirling Moss is considered the greatest driver who never won the championship. To be respected by your contemporaries in a competitive milieu should be championship enough for anybody.

Racing in that time and place was a blur between amateur and professional sport. It wasn’t professionalized, but money was involved. It wasn’t until there was a lot of money on the table that people were attracted to racing simply because there was a big pot to be won.

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