Aw, Yeah. Hot Wheels!

Aw, Yeah. Hot Wheels!

Hot Wheels were never like this. Hot Wheels were always like this.

It was the best of die-cast times. It was the worst of die-cast times. We had Matchbox cars back in the day, and then Hot Wheels showed up. Matchbox cars looked just like real cars and trucks. They were miniatures, not toys, exactly. You’d push them around in little fantasy towns made of Legos or American Bricks, but honestly, their hyper-reality made the fantasy a little less fantastic. Being real offers its own kind of fun, but unreality lets the mind wander more.

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Needs More Cowbell

Needs More Cowbell


The internet is a cruel mistress. They say a mistress is like a sailboat. The rigging always costs more than the hull. That’s why mistresses try to keep your attention on the rigging at all times. It’s good advice for how you behave on the internet, too. Keep an eye on your image, people.

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The Least Interesting Man in the World

The Least Interesting Man in the World


I’ve searched and searched. Looked high and low. Hither and yon. Here, there, and everywhere. I’ve questioned the authorities, and unsatisfied, I questioned authority and investigated the matter on my own. I’m ready to make a pronouncement. This is the least interesting man in the world.

If it was just a 17-minute video about trying to fix a busted generator, he wouldn’t win, place or show. Tedium is not enough. This fellow graduates to the big time, goes from single equis to two equis, when he decides to make a three-video epic out of his busted Generac. That’s when he seizes the prize, the title of The Least Interesting Man in the World.

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