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Keanu Reeves Really Can Shoot

Keanu Reeves Really Can Shoot

Keanu is making a nice living for himself shooting people in amusing ways with the whole John Wick thing. If it wasn’t for him, all we’d have is Liam Neeson shooting people in amusing ways. I never really got the impression that Liam could kick anyone’s arse from watching his grumpy old man goes on a rampage movies, of which there are many to choose from. But it appears that Keanu really can shoot a bit.

Next thing you know, they’ll be telling us that Cary Grant really did sleep with a lot of women.

The Movie With an Excess of Zeal

The Movie With an Excess of Zeal

Free Advice: Don’t try to win an Oscar for an adventure picture the same year that Lawrence of Arabia gets made. Don’t try to make any money, either.

So you get Marlon Brando to annoy Captain Bligh for you while he tries to decide what kind of accent a British person has. That’s supposed to put butts in the seats. But it didn’t. They made a real, live Bounty for the movie, and sailed it all over the Pacific, but even that didn’t help. Brando got a hot looking wife out of the deal, and bought an island or two, but everyone else took a saltwater bath on the deal.

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The Navarong Artillery

The Navarong Artillery

You know, Steven Speilberg didn’t invent Nazis.

The history of moviemaking is only a century old or so. It’s really possible to see all the notable movies ever made. That’s because there aren’t very many of them. A few movies break new ground, one way or another, or at least get the fundamentals of story-telling correct for a  change. Then Hollywood apes them in hundreds of movies until the audience can’t take it any more, and starts watching television. The suits wait for a new messiah to take them from the desert of Victor Mature movies to the Promised Land of The Guns of Navarone.

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In a World Where Oompa-Loompas Stalk the Countryside and Bathe In the Blood of Their Victims, One Man Will Try to Rule Them All

In a World Where Oompa-Loompas Stalk the Countryside and Bathe In the Blood of Their Victims, One Man Will Try to Rule Them All

There’s no earthly way of knowing, which direction we are going. There’s no knowing where we’re rowing, or which way the river’s flowing. Is it raining? Is it snowing? Is a hurricane a–blowing?

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