You know what? I want to set a world record. I’ve been thinking about the record for “largest laptop pyramid.” It’s like those card pyramids, except done with laptops. First, I’m gonna go out and buy several hundred laptops. I don’t have those yet.
And if I don’t set the world record for “largest laptop pyramid,” I will certainly set the world record for “most money hemorrhaged in a single day.” It’s win-win!
It’s easy to master any instrument. But that would take time and practice –you know, effort — and I doubt you wanna deal with all that. Why not invent your own instrument, like this bellowphone here? You’ll immediately be a virtuoso. Same way an architect who builds his own house doesn’t get lost in it. He planned every nook and cranny of the place. A man who builds his own instrument knows every nuance of his creation. He doesn’t need as much practice to master said creation. Since no one else knows how to play, technically, you don’t need any practice to be world-class at it. In a world class of one, you’re always the valedictorian.
Y’know, this guy is on to something. I have a feeling this hand thing is gonna be big. I just know it. I mean, the Muppets were big, and they were technically hands. The “Hand Movies” will not only be great for action, but for other genres, too. You’re in the mood for a comedy? Go check out Tom Hands’s classic film The Hand with One Red Glove. It’s an absolute wrist-slapper. Or maybe you want something a little more dramatic. The Handmaiden’s Tale is definitely for you. There’s a ton of money in this I tell ya’!
I met a car repairman once. Well, he used to be a car repairman. This video reminds me of the time he quit his job. On a bright and sunny afternoon, he had an argument with his boss while working under my car. Then, he quit, rolled out on his creeper and took off like these guys did. He basically invented this skateboarding stuff. Everybody went crazy over it. Skateboarding was the bee’s knees.
Me, I couldn’t care less about his skateboards. I just want my car back!