This fellow is a true genius. Not one of those fake geniuseses. I mean, fake genii. No, that’s not it either. Fake smart guys.

Anyway, math has never been my strong suit. As a matter of fact, I only own one strong suit. It’s hanging in my closet, and it doesn’t fit anymore. I wore it, once, to a funeral seven years ago. Now it won’t button in front, and the sleeves and pant legs are too short.

At any rate, math of any kind is one of those things that other people say they have first-hand knowledge of, and I hear about, like UFO abductions or honest politicians. In my mind, math barely exists. Ask my credit card company. They love how bad I am at math.

So to sum up, I think calculus is a kind of math, but I’m not sure. It looks like like math with letters sprinkled in, which is even worse than math with just plain numbers in it. If you’re ever forced at gunpoint to do some calculus, I suggest using this guy’s method. Or trying to wrest the gun away. In no case try calculus unaided.