Robots To Replace Wives Entirely By 2015

Robots To Replace Wives Entirely By 2015

How many of you men out there drink beer? Alright, alright, calm yourselves, that was a rhetorical question. Of course you all drink beer, does the Pope poop in his funny hat? Wait, that’s not quite right. Does a bear poop in the pope’s funny hat? Naturally he does, and naturally you all drink beer. How many of you men have had to go through the trouble of getting up off your couch to go get a beer, leaving your perfect butt imprint that took you hours to make. There has to be a better way to acquire beverages.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “But Charlie, I have a wife and a mini-fridge, and I’m pretty sure polygamy is illegal.” You bring up some valid points reader, but some of us have no wife and no mini-fridge. Polygamy doesn’t even enter into it in a position like mine, because I still need that first wife.

What I need, is a good old fashioned robot to do my bidding. They’re cool, clean, efficient, and oh so hip to the now, if you catch my drift. Order yours now, for only 10,000 tiny payments of $2.99.

4 thoughts on “Robots To Replace Wives Entirely By 2015

  1. 2015?

    I guess I missed that update.

    It all seems a foolish trick when the real advancement ought to be to just manufacture a full glass of beer, as is.

    I know that sounded stupid, but at least it’s on point.

    Hey! Another thought occurs! Why not invent a place just down the block where you go in and a beer is on this flat thingy and they provide you with a round, upright and padded doohicky to sit on? Hmmmm. You might even give it a spiffy name, like the Blue Moon or the Comet.

    This way, the wife don’t enter into it (said in Michael Caine accent).

  2. Ah, the local. A place of rest and repose. A convivial place. A refuge. Then once, they try ladies night, and the place goes to perdition.

  3. The Scots and the Irish, until recently, made the women sit in an ante room. None allowed on the actual premises.

    Were they stupid? Were they brilliant? I ask ye: did not the former ways make for the most harmony, and the smoother drinking experience?

    Other establishments also had the idea of putting the ladies on a pedestal, and with alternating clothing/ no clothing events. See? Still no ladies allowed where the drinking goes.

    Now, you didn’t hear me approve of none of this. I’m just trying to allow for more thinking. Man! I feel thirsty!

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