Girls are soft and they smell good. Every man wants to spend his time with someone who’s soft and smells good. It’s in our nature. However, we mostly spend our time with other sweaty dudes, grunting and swearing and handing each other wrenches. For the most part, women would rather not have anything to do with us. But we keep looking for ways to trick them into thinking we’re alright.
Some men go out to night clubs to try to pick up women. Of course women have better things to do, so clubs are just filled with funny-smelling dudes looking for nonexistent women. Others try online dating That’s a fool’s errand, as there are no women on the internet, just other men, and policemen. Online dating is still better than nightclubs, though, because you only have to shower and put on pants on the day you upload your profile picture.
Finding girlfriends is hard enough. Keeping one happy is damn near impossible. This kid has three. Good luck, little dude. You’re gonna need it.