Shine On You Crazy Briton

Shine On You Crazy Briton

The British are a funny people. Part Norman, part Saxon, part Angle, part Dane, 100-percent crazy. They conquered 25 percent of the planet for giggles, they birthed the greatest countries on Earth from a little isle that barely shows up on a map, and I’m not entirely sure how they got so good at creating absurdly productive any useful people. Moreover, I’m not sure where all of those people went, but I know one thing for certain — they’re all completely nuts.

They’re not the run-of-the-mill nuts either. Simple Cyrillic lollygagging isn’t good enough for them, and I’ve never seen an Englishman say, “Hold my beer and watch this”. With a pip-pip and a cheerio they’ll launch themselves into direct machine gun fire or conquer an entire sub-continent. That’s the British form of nuts. Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun.

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