He’s in the middle of the water, yet he’s wearing a helmet. I’m not sure what he thinks he’s going to hit his head on. Maybe the helmet is keeping his shattered skull together after a failed attempt at a different stunt, but it’s still quite confusing. Why a helmet and not a life jacket? That seems much more practical. While being practical isn’t my strong suit, I can usually identify, target, and hunt down the practical. Then again, having an aquatic dirt bike isn’t exactly the most practical thing in the world.

Australians are a strange breed of people. I’m not quite sure what they’re about, but I wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of them in a bar fight. I can’t quite tell if they’re all born on the more unfortunate side of the bell curve or if they’re all completely fearless. When you’re born on a continent where everything that isn’t trying to kill you outright is trying burrow into your brain and feast on the goo inside, you tend to lose your sight of what truly matters. Not drowning is important.

Personally, I put not drowning over everything else. To the average Australian, not drowning ranks pretty low on the list of things that are important. Fosters, sheilas, and sheep dip are all that the average Australian needs to survive, the rest is conversation. Breathing doesn’t really come up that often.