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Vodka fixes everything — this is a fact. I know it’s a fact, and I will continue to shout it into the abyss that is the Intertunnel until the day I get bored and stop. The only reason that plane was able to land safely was because of the obscene amount of vodka that fellow brought in his carry-on bags. Without vodka there is chaos, so he probably just averted an international catastrophe of epic proportions.

A Russian cannot function unless he has a couple drinks in him, so vodka man was doing his fellow countrymen a great service. Unfortunately, you can only get so drunk off a simple bottle of vodka, which is why I think that Russians will stop drinking vodka altogether. Having it injected intravenously is a much better option