For God’s Sake, I’m Warning You, Mute The Video Before You Watch It

For God’s Sake, I’m Warning You, Mute The Video Before You Watch It


The Borderline Sociopathic Boy stays cool under pressure.

You’re in a bad situation. Very bad situation. But you don’t want to make things worse for yourself, do you? No, so you keep cool. You hang in there. You do what a man’s got to do. You wait until the last second, then you do what you have to do with no hesitation. 

If you can keep your head when all about you   
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,   
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;   
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;   
    If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;   
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;   
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,   
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,   
    Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,   
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,   
    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

Or you can just stand there and say OH MY GOD over and over again. That might work out, too.

[Thanks to reader and commenter Leon for sending that one along]

One thought on “For God’s Sake, I’m Warning You, Mute The Video Before You Watch It

  1. The wonderful, late actor Dennis Hopper, recites this poem on You Tube. Not to be missed.

    I just watched a grainy vid of a helicopter rescue of a 4 year old boy from the mudslide in Washington. Exciting stuff, and the Snohomish sheriff’s department did a crackerjack job in the first hours of the event. Hat is off to those guys.

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