Welcome to day 1 of our startup company, gentleman. What is our startup about? It’s about making things better in the world of technology. We are determined to expand upon the future of tech, as we are passionate about computer science and the world. We can do this!
Our first step is to gather a bunch of expensive hard drives and make a symphony orchestra out of them. Theoretically, we will magically have money after this.
Well, the script is a little repetitive, but it’s still better than the end of Game of Thrones, you have to admit.
Me, I get all of my strong potions from my dad’s desk. He tells me not to tell mom about it, because she made him throw away all of his strongest potions when they got hitched. She says that dad goes out on epic quests whenever he drinks strong potions, so he’s not allowed to partake anymore. She says he has a family to take care of now and needs to act responsibly. But he’s an adventurer at heart, so he keeps them around anyway. Every once and a while he lets me take a sip of his potions, and I get the urge to go out and battle my enemies. I also get a headache.
Of course, I’d need a fake ID if I ever wanted to buy my own strong potions. I’m only a level 18 knight, and I’m not allowed to buy potions until I’m level 21. And remember, kids: don’t potion and drive!
Well, that Hackerman lad means well, but he’s never going to get chicks or receive a government grant with that sort of approach. His sweet style is likely to be irresistible to hot babes, don’t get me wrong. It’s just that “hacking time” isn’t really where the action is in computer science these days. Mass erasing Twitter postings that don’t conform to this afternoon’s social justice opinions is where the smart money is being spent. That, and selling electric cars at a $10,000 loss per car and making it up on volume.
Anyway, the Borderline Sociopathic Blog for Boys doesn’t write checks with our ass that our mouth can’t cash. Wait, that sounded bad. We don’t walk the talk until we’ve stolen another man’s moccasins. Hmm. That didn’t sound quite right, either. Anyway, we’re willing to post our scientistic research papers online for peer review. Unfortunately, peers are very hard to find in our niche, mostly because we’re so awesome. Among ourselves, we refer to peer review as: letting the pets up on the furniture. If you’re interested, you can read our treatise on Deconstructing SCSI Disks. It’s a grabber.
You wouldn’t steal a handbag. You wouldn’t steal a car. You wouldn’t steal a baby. You wouldn’t shoot a policeman — and then steal his helmet. You wouldn’t go to the toilet in his helmet. And then send it to the policeman’s grieving widow — and then steal it again!