They probably should have gone with Jurassic Park with a cat in the first place. I mean, a T-rex is pretty formidable, but nothing is meaner than a house cat. Hell, T-rexes just bite you in half and get it over with, but a cat will smack you around for hours before he gets bored with you and claws you to bits. And of course a T-rex can’t grab you with his tiny front legs and give you the bunny feet treatment with his hind legs like a cat can. Case closed.
Way out West there was this fella — fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Kyutaro. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself.Kyutaro, he called himself Kyutaro. Now, Kyutaro — he didn’t make a whole lot of sense. And a lot about where he lived, likewise.
Every once in a while, the Blog For Boys has to do something to keep up the appearance that we’re a reputable site that’s suitable for viewing by most humans. We must dispel any notion that we’re secretly trying to control your mind with subliminal messages embedded in the text. Be sure todrink your ovaltine. One of the best ways to keep things on the straight and narrow, is to pay a cat tax to the Intertunnel gods. We’ve sunk to the lowest common denominator to make sure that things run smoothly over here at the Blog for Boys headquarters. Here’s a video of a cat having a religious experience — probably because he drank his Ovaltine.
Cats are completely out of their minds in the most wonderful way. They’re one of the only animals in the world that can have hours of fun with a paper bag without pooping everywhere and making a huge mess. Cats are very shy about their poop, which is a plus if you’re not into finding giant, sloppy turds in the middle of the rug every other day.
Think about it, dogs act like marvelous idiots all the time, but they either wind up hurting themselves, pooping everywhere, or vomiting. I like dogs as much as the next guy, but they’re way too much work. Cats on the other hand are entirely self-contained. They can bounce off the walls without hurting themselves all the time and the worst they’ll do is pee in your potted plants. Yes, there’s always the off chance that they’ll try to smother you in your sleep or gouge your eyes out, but it’s better than carrying around a bag full of poop. I’m a man, not a wastebasket
So if you’re fond of having a furry, dangerously dimwitted friend roaming the house, consider buying a cat — or you could ask your parents for a little brother.