Real Men Are Useful To Their Fellow Man
Flight delays are dreary. That’s because airports are dreary places. Long before they started hiring proctologists to greet you at the gate, all the humanity had been chased out of the whole process of going from here to there. Things could only go from bad to worse, and boy howdy, haven’t they?
The stewardesses got old and cranky. The application for a baggage handler job only had one question on it: Do you hate handling baggage? If so, you’re hired. We went from a kind of airborne version of a four-star hotel to steerage in a rusty freighter within a span of 25 years.
So it’s already awful, and then it gets awfuler. A flight delay. Your sentence is lengthened, and there’s no time off for good behavior. What’s a guy to do? Bust out the instruments, and make everyone’s day a little less worse. When I’m dead and buried, I’d kill to have He Made Someone’s Day a Little Less Worse on my headstone. It’s the only testament a real man should strive for.
6 thoughts on “Real Men Are Useful To Their Fellow Man”
That is a good one. Another favorite worth striving for is “loved by kids and dogs.”
Aww, I dunno. “Spoiled the right-kind -of-somebody’s breakfast. Often.” would look well on my gravestone.
Marvelous music, but.
Hi Julie!
Hello Thon- Thanks for reading and commenting at the BSBFB. I hope my gravestone will feature my dying words: “Either this wallpaper goes, or I go.”
I fly to the only thing I do that resembles work. Yes, it’s bad. Once, at a mega airport (I think it was NYC, possibly Kennedy), they decided to switch my gate at the last minute, from the farthest from any hub to the length of the airport farthest from where I was and you’ll need to hop a bus that drives under taxiing jet wings on the runway.
This was only slightly worse than the time the foreign airport refused my flight just because I had a kitty cat in a box, or maybe it was my breath. Same thing.
Music makes everything better, and they do a really great job of musicing in the Austin airport. Go figure.
The thing is, that since 9-11, a whole generation of airline execs have come of age not remembering before 9-11. This is the new normal. Is that a good line for a headstone? This Is The New Normal.
Commenting here makes no sense to anyone else but me, but gee it is fun.
“Commenting here makes no sense to anyone else but me…”
Wrong again, Casey.
I meant, “my comments here..,” Max. I was in the airport in my mind when I misspoke.
Carry on. err…proceed. Continue to march.