I come not to praise stolen Mustang man, but to bury him. The police say he was not an honorable man. But let’s give him his props. Creep can roll.

The cops are fighting with one hand tied behind their back, of course. They’re driving Medicare sleds. They have big engines and all, but they’re freighters. A Ford Mustang is hardly a Ferrari, but it’s got some giddyup. The Crown Vics probably have the same engine as our favorite perp, but the car probably weighs a ton more, plus Officer Manatee and two dozen donuts usually weighs a fair bit.

I love the regular traffic report interspersed with the high speed chase. It’s the equivalent of continuing with the regular weather report even though the aurora borealis appeared at noon in Miami.

Admit it, halfway through this thing, you start wondering how he’ll get away this time. You don’t approve of what he’s doing, but then again, a part of you doesn’t really want it to end, either. I’ve read that the reason we like to watch “heist” movies is simply because we love to see hard work rewarded. It allows you to more or less root for criminals for a little while. So here’s to you, high speed chase man. You were fun while you lasted. Enjoy your well deserved beating.