Have you ever had a bad day? I imagine that fellow is having a bad day. Not the sort of day any of us are familiar with. I’m talking about the sort of day that gets written about in bad pop songs. He’s going through a day that turns into the intro sequence for a daytime TV show, except there’s less jangly music in the background and more assault charges.

If you’re having a bad day today, at least you can rest easy in the fact that your day isn’t nearly as bad as it could be. You probably still have your health and a home to go back to after fate has finished pushing your face into the sand. Moreover, there’s a good chance that you still have your car, which is a lot more than this fellow will have after all the rigmarole is done.