Competitive Triangle Climbing Sweeps Nation, Takes Out Trash, Walks Dog
I have a theory that you can put dubstep in the background of anything and make it into a YouTube sensation. Not that there’s anything wrong with competitive triangle climbing. I’m just saying that our brains have been programmed to react to certain audio cues regardless of what’s happening on camera. It’s like a Pavlovian response, except Pavlov never dropped a bass in his life. A video like this simply wouldn’t have the same effect if Debussy was sawing away in the background. It would be a much more pleasant and surreal video, but not front page of the Intertunnel material.
I suggest that we test my theory in some way. If we take a sport that seems outwardly tedious and layer on a little bit of dubstep will anyone notice? Will people find the sport more interesting than it actually is? Can we use this knowledge to make baseball, soccer, and golf watchable while sober? Nah, probably not. You’ll never be able to make soccer interesting under any circumstance.
5 thoughts on “Competitive Triangle Climbing Sweeps Nation, Takes Out Trash, Walks Dog”
Hey! I’ll have you know I played on the #1 college soccer team in the country many years ago and…and…yeah, it’s not really a spectator sport in my book, either. Carry on…
Soccer is good to watch live if you are close to the action. Which means a high school game, and only the 25% of the time it’s near you. If your kid is playing.
I have been mesmerized by golf on my father-in-law’s TV for years when we go down. I have no idea why.
Could it be that it beats talking to your in-laws?
I find there’s a strange phenomenon that happens when a TV is turned on in a relative’s house. Suddenly everything that’s happening on-screen is so interesting you can’t take your eyes off it or communicate with anyone around you.
Bouldering is the ultimate climbing motif. In bouldering, you contrive moves and add rules till even congress would revolt. Himalayan climbing: exactly the opposite. Anything goes.
What was that about music? Oh yeah. Climbing is boring to watch, but exhilarating to participate in. Climbers are boring, too. I always wanted to hang out with river-rafters, because climbers are narcissists of a cloistered order.
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