There can be no mightier man than the Dad Man.
See, Dad Man starts out big. He’s ten feet tall with arms like derricks and legs like tree trunks. He picks you up like a rag doll and throws you up in the air like a satellite. His voice booms like dragons arguing in a cave. His beard is like pavement. You’re down there on the floor, and he’s up there in the heavens. He has pockets full of quarters. He is the mightiest man you know.
Then there’s this guy. He’s Dad Man squared.
(Thanks to reader Jonathan Frost-Johnson for sending that one along, via The Silicon Graybeard)