I don’t know what Jesus from The Big Lebowski is doing in the gym. I don’t know what he thinks he’s doing on the lat machine, exactly. I don’t know if he takes all the tires off his car and rides around town by turning the steering wheel back and forth really fast while vigorously scooching forward on the seat.

I have no idea what’s going on. But I want to hire out an auditorium and stage a steel cage match between this guy and the Techno-Viking. Admit it, you’d buy tickets.