Oh, sure, you’re Mr. Cool at the gas station. You don’t pull up to the pumps on the wrong side. I bet when you use the squeegee, you get just the right angle and don’t leave that little stripe of grime on the overlaps. You pause after the auto shutoff for a few seconds so the nozzle won’t drip gasoline on your tasseled loafers, too. You wipe your hands with the little blue towelettes they have on the canopy stanchions, I bet. Those are for girls, you know.

And then there’s this guy.