Dude Bro Dress Code Infractions

Dude Bro Dress Code Infractions

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There’s one fellow in the video who seems fairly confused. For a good portion of the proceedings, he’s wearing his trucker cap with the brim facing forward. I know, right? I’m surprised his friends didn’t disown him on the spot. How can any self-respecting dude-bro yell WHOOO with his hat on right? It’s an abomination. It also leads to more bad habits. If you turn your hat around forward, pretty soon you’re shaking hands instead of high-fiving. You might even try on a pair of long pants. Leather shoes with laces start to look good to you. Shirts with buttons. Before you know it, you’re talking to girls over dinner in restaurants that don’t have a drive through, and your friends won’t talk to you at all.

How Ta Git Jer Own Bait

How Ta Git Jer Own Bait

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https://youtu.be/bAt0YfDDACk

I love the drawl and the shakey-cam video style. It’s like a Jason Bourne movie without the exercise regimen and most of the murders. Of course the cat food inside the panty hose truck nuts bait bag is an inspired design. It must be hard for a self-proclaimed redneck to get his hands on some panty hose. No woman he knows would wear them. It’s strictly jean shorts and halter tops. And all the guys he knows are using their supply of panty hose to pull over their heads when they rob convenient stores. I doubt they could spare them for a bait trap.

I only have one question: If you’ve caught all those minnows, why bother using them to catch fish? Just eat them and be done with it.

It’s Sturges Bike Week. Get Your Mopeds Running. Head Out On The Highway

It’s Sturges Bike Week. Get Your Mopeds Running. Head Out On The Highway

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If you’ve never heard of it, the Sturges motorcycle rally is sorta like a Jimmy Buffet concert with more Jack Daniels, or a Gathering of the Juggalos with less meth. All the fun is of the sort that you’re not supposed to have anymore. You know, doing donuts and eating donuts. The girls dress like strumpets and expect you to look at them, unlike every office building in America where the girls dress like strumpets and sue you for looking at them.

It’s a little weird seeing the Harley motorbike culture becoming wholesome compared to other American subcultures. Everyone in the video seems well-adjusted and happy. They must not get good phone service in Sturges, and are forced to have fun instead of texting and forming Twitter mobs to protest things. It is amusing to notice that all the events are sponsored by insurance companies, however.

Suspect Is Armed And Dangerous, Approach With Caution Unless You Want A Nasty Paper Cut

Suspect Is Armed And Dangerous, Approach With Caution Unless You Want A Nasty Paper Cut

At least he’s doing something with his engineering degree.

There has to be some sort of military application for a gun that makes and shoots paper airplanes. An entire army equipped with paper-airplane guns would dominate the battlefield. I suspect that enemy troops would become so disoriented from the constant barrage of little pieces of paper they would throw down their weapons in disgust and go home. If that doesn’t cause them to flee their position in terror, we could start launching other papier-mâché eggs and small paper animals.

If that doesn’t work, we’ll break out the flamethrowers and then we’ll see how much they like being covered in paper airplanes.