Great stuff, no doubt. But he’s missing an opportunity here. How about some good old fashioned competition for the public tram? I mean real competition, not skateboarding on rails. Why not screw on a couple of seats, and then start charging less money than public transportation? Hire some bums to push the things along. All the track you need is already laid out for you by taxpayers. I bet you could get some sweet, sweet venture capital money and run at a loss for years while still making yourself rich.
You’ll need a neato name for your pallet transit company, though. A catchy name, a fly website, and little else is essential in today’s economy. What would be a great name for a transportation company that leeches off of public infrastructure, ignores all employment and safety laws, and takes investor money to avoid having to turn a profit indefinitely while still enriching investors? He should call it Uber.
I’ve actually driven an old Shelby Mustang back in the day. I worked at a body shop, and a Shelby had to be delivered, and I was a worthless scut worker, so I was elected. I was only 16 or 17 at the time. It had a floor shift, of course, but I’d driven three on the tree, so a clutch held no terrors for me. It had one of those white and powder blue color schemes that screams Shelby Mustang.
I’ll tell you something. It was a full time job keeping that car from launching itself into orbit. Steering didn’t matter, because you can’t turn the wheel five degrees off straight ahead and hope to live. I just wanted to keep the car on the ground, and I couldn’t do it. It left rubber in every gear, every time. It literally hopped forward like a rabid leopard when you stepped on the accelerator. To this day, I have no idea how either the car or I survived the trip. But it was a gas.
Sober Foosball, Bigfoot, Nessie, and Other Unlikely Things
Has anyone ever played foosball while sober? Just wondering. I know I never have, but you never know, maybe someone, somewhere has. Of course while I’m open to evidence that sober foosball is a thing, no one is ever going to convince me that sober Pac-Man was ever a thing. I know, I was there, in the arcade, with a roll of quarters. Well, at least I think I was. For some reason, a lot of it was a blur.