Being a good husband and father is a very subversive act these days. The authorities better keep their eye on this guy.
(Thanks to Vanderleun for skating that one on over)
Luckily dangerous things like Lawn Darts and firecrackers and such are mostly banned, otherwise young men might injure themselves while fooling around. Young men are like that, I’m told.
(Thanks to Charles Schneider for sending that one along)
At least once in your life, leave all the gear at home, go outside, and play hockey on onyx ice. It’s good for the soul. NO LIFTING!