When I was a kid I always wanted to be a scientist, but I kept drinking all the contents of whatever we were working on in lab class. Apparently that makes it much more difficult to be a scientist. It also makes it much more difficult to breathe and see properly, but I didn’t find that out until I had time to digest everything.
Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist’s, but that’s just peanuts to space.
“Share and Enjoy’ is the company motto of the hugely successful Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Complaints Division, which now covers the major land masses of three medium-sized planets and is the only part of the Corporation to have shown a consistent profit in recent years. The motto stands– or rather stood– in three mile high illuminated letters near the Complaints Department spaceport on Eadrax.
Vogon poetry, is of course, the third worst in the universe.
The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem “Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning” four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off.