Longest. Ski Jump. Evar. Now With Translation
It’s almost summertime, so of course I’m fascinated with ski jumping. Snow doesn’t really seem to have much to do with ski jumping anymore, so anytime’s a good time to watch pale humans doing their finest Rocket J. Squirrel imitation. I think I saw someone mowing the lawn five feet off to the side of the piste or jump thing or whatever you call it.
Anyway, I of course speak perfect Norwegish. I picked it up by watching curling matches on cable access TV in the Upper Peninsula. It comes in handy when you’re trying to watch ski jumping. I know all BSBFB readers speak all the languages necessary to watch shovel racing, hurling, wife carrying, elephant polo, cheese rolling, canal vaulting, caber tossing, and pie eating. In the off chance that somebody doesn’t know what the announcer is saying in the video, I’ve translated it into Spanish for you:
Burrito, gasolina, dale! Salsa, tequila, corazón cerveza, muy bueno! Taco, Eva Mendez, gringo, costa, chorizo, Santa Maria, Tex Mex, Shakira, nachos, salsa, sombrero, gato negro, mojito, old El Paso, Madrid, Chihuahua, Adelén, por favor bailando guacamole, jalapeño, Salma Hayek, Ricki Martin, balacao muy bueno.
Mariachi, gasolina, calamari, muchas gracias. Macarena mi amigo.Living la vida loca.Antonio Banderas, dale. Salsa, tequila, corazón cerveza, muy bueno! Las ketchup, desesperado, Mallorca, si cortado. Corazón, la bamba, arriba, Carlos Santana Selena Gomez, porque machete, enchilada. Uno, dos, tres, cuatro Tony Montana. Uno, dos, tres, Tequila!
One thought on “Longest. Ski Jump. Evar. Now With Translation”
That was the absolute latest you could hold that flight. Any longer and he would be landing on the uphill which would be catastrophic. He was the pale Tiger Woods of ski jumping. They are now going to need to lengthen the fairways of jumping to make it “fair” for other, paler jumpers.