I don’t think I can argue with this, but I can tell you a thing or two about helping your neighbors, building your local economy, and improving your nation. None of it can compare to getting completely blitzed. When was the last time your neighbors did anything for you? Exactly. Anyways, alcohol has been helping man for over 4000 years.

I had a friend who used to go to a bar every night and order shots of whiskey all night. After each shot he’d lean back and look down at his lap, and then order another shot. After a while the bartender would have to ask what my friend was looking at. He’d have a picture of his wife on his lap, and when she started to look good, he’d go home. That is how alcohol is better than improving your nation.