Even nerds become dads at some point. After a while they have to put down the vidyagames and anime long enough to procreate. It’s rare, I know, but it happens. They have the same emotions and needs as functioning humans, so try to be nice. We all have dreams of saving the princess from an awful fate at the hands of a warty, disfigured villain, taking her back to our castle and jumping her bones ad infinitum. I just prefer to do it in real life and with less Latin.
But when nerd love does happen it’s a beautiful thing. The sight of two sweaty, nervous, zitty basement dwellers fawning over each other while reading Klingon poetry brings a tear to my eye. It causes such an explosion of emotions inside me I feel obliged to go kick sand in their faces. It’s the natural order of things.
In our mind’s eye, it was always like this. We’d mouth the pew pew sounds and cries of happy agony as the little green fellows fell over. We’d advance and retreat over the carpeted ground, or perhaps over the hardwood steppes. Snipers using rubber bands would take out the unwary lieutenant, always motioning: Onward!
The manual is Cantonese, and I’m German, but what the hell. I once put together an IKEA shelf. Only took fourteen days. It’s leans to the left a bit, and you can’t put books on it, but I think it’s awesome. I should be able to repair a helicopter if I read a pamphlet. I’m a guy. Guys are good at that sort of thing.