The BSBFB heartily approve of the weaponization of common household items. Four alarm chili, for example, can be turned into a biological weapon, or at least require a courtesy flush.

But what’s with all the melon hate? The watermelon is a proud component of every Borderline Boy’s diet, allowing you to spit things in front  of your mother without a scolding. The management of the BSBFB believes that watermelons deserve better. We hereby suggest that these proud melons be spared further destruction. Perhaps we could suggest an alternative target. Something everyone hates. You know, like purse dogs or school lunches.

(Thanks to BSBFB devotee Charles Schneider for sending that one along)