I love calling it rollerskating. It drives guys like this right up the wall. Er, I mean further up the wall. Somehow he thinks calling them roller blades is supposed to make them cool. I am beset by doubts on that score.
Back before everyone lost their minds, the role of a man and a dog and a rat in nature’s pecking order was well understood. Men are born to get sh*t done. Dogs are domesticated to help them. Rats are nobody’s friend. That’s that. Or, it used to be that, anyway.
They’re hunted to extinction now, but thank God someone got a picture of real men while they were still walking the Earth. I have it on good authority that this is the way real men acted back in the day. They weren’t afraid of a hot rivet, of course, because ten years before this, they’d been shot at by the Wehrmacht and the Imperial Japanese Navy.
Pistols at sunrise is so 18th century. Rapiers in the courtyard while seconds look on is all well and good if you’re in Heidelberg, but that won’t cut it in China. If you want to decide who’s the Top Dog, the Big Cheese, el jefe — you’re going to need to show up with some serious equipment.